Yes, I Got Dumped

Yes, I Got Dumped

“It’s not you it’s me. And other BS lines we all say but don’t believe”


Ah yes its Saturday. I awoke and thought to myself -as I laid the failures of my previous week to rest. All I wanted to do was relax and immerse myself in the company of good people and possibly a glass of wine or two or my newfound favourite drink gin and tonic.

Feeling slightly unfit I cancelled a hike I was supposed to embark on with some old high school friends and decided to instead do some light shopping then head on to see my male companion, after sending a confirmation for our plans later that evening. I received the text everyone dreads:

“I think you great. But I love my ex”

The text was far longer but for the purpose of getting to my devastation I amended it.  So after rereading it a few times and comprehending that I had just been dumped, I sat down for roughly 30 minutes to wallow in self-pity thinking about the number of times I had sent similar messages not meaning a single word just trying to spare the other persons feelings as much as possible.

I started thinking about whether or not I would have preferred complete brutal honesty from him something along the lines of… Hypothetically speaking of course:

  • You too damn loud for me to deal with
  • I hate your feet. Damn girl next time warn a brother
  • I hate that you always giving your opinion. You speak for a living I get it
  • Why do you sing when you cook, you may be a natural woman but you ain’t no Aretha

I’m not saying what he said isn’t true just thinking how much more entertaining it would have been if it wasn’t a generic “it’s not you it’s me” break up text, I would have been so amused if at the very least when I got out the uber at his gate and I pressed the intercom button.

He’d say

“Look I’m not opening the gate but listen you great. It’s not you it’s me. The police will be here in 15minutes, not saying you crazy but just in case. Anyway take care of yourself girl and by the way white is definitely your colour. BYE!!”

As he would continue to watch me through the window, I would then have to sit on my suitcase as I watch cars drive by looking at me suspiciously while I await my ubers return.

How absolutely hysterical would that have been? I digress back to my heartbreak and devastation.

When my new week commenced, I came to the realisation that I was undergoing my Quarter Life Crisis- a period of life usually ranging from the early twenties to the mid-twenties, in which a person begins to feel doubtful about their own lives and achievements.

I have always been a planner and goal orientated individual, at the age of twenty my five- year plan consisted of:

  • A stable career
  • A notable difference I’ve made in my country
  • A great relationship

My 25th birthday is slowly approaching and I have made peace with the fact that I may not have accomplished what I set out to but I am so grateful for the new journey life has placed me on. I had to experience a tough week in order to make big life changes and to learn to let go of my stiff ideals. Referring to my goals as guidelines instead of a set in stone plan.

I’m so happy to report that my heartbreak has subsided along with my Quarter Life Crises so drop me a mail and take me to lunch. Hahaha


With Love Always

Candice Mama

1 Comment

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  1. Yolande Sowazi

    It’s part of growing up Candi, life lessons ain’t always fun but we survive. I can’t stop thinking about our conversations regarding this it’s hella tough out there 🤗🤗

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